Jun 4, 2011

Hair Errant: Mike Miller


 
Yes, it's true -- Mike Miller has had a rough season.

Miami's supposed sharpshooter was out till Dec. 20 after injuring his thumb in the pre-season. Afterward, Miller scored in double figures just nine times in the regular season and once in the playoffs. (Way to go, Heat -- dropping a cool $5 mil on a freezing cold swingman.)

Then, just as Miami was tussling with the Bulls in the Eastern Conference finals, Miller's daughter was born with a serious heart condition.

So, ever since May 18, Miller hasn't gotten much sleep.

Which goes a long way toward explaining this 'do.

TCL can't decide, but he seems to be channeling either the munchkins triplets from The Wizard of Oz or Lily Tomlin's Ernestine.

Poor guy. Still, Miller IS a serial weird-'do. In his 10 years in the NBA, he's come down with his own serious hair conditions. (Hold your nose and see here, here and here.)

Admittedly, he has tried to cure himself, but the result was not exactly the best corrective.

Aw, well, he's got four years remaining on that $25 million contract, so there's still hope.
 

Dec 4, 2008

KTJ Reaches Cruising Attitude


 
Tuning in to TNT on Thursday night is like coming home after a long, rough day and having the hubby draw you a hot bath and a Scotch on the rocks -- you just know in the end that someone is looking out for you.

And so it is with Sir Charles, Kenny "The Jet" Smith and Ernie Johnson. (At this point in the 2008-09 season, having exchanged vows w/the NBA in '07-08, TCL refuses to even acknowledge WTF MarC Fein is....)

So, we were all the more thrilled to see KTJ decked out in more than his usual respectable finery recently, to mull the fate of one-man leper colony Stephon Marbury. (That Starbury-Steve-n-Barry's head tat is really moving the $25 sneakers now, isn't it?)

Let's just say right here, right now that here at TCL we are rather brazon Kevin Garnett fans -- OY! his skillz! his 'tude! his fashion sense! (Oh, puh-leeze with that LeBron pre-game, wannabe chalk-to-the-heavens thing -- who can forget 2003-04?) And KG's nerdy and sweet sweater vests over baggy white oxfords set a trend that was quickly adopted across a league desperate to distance itself from a Thug Life archetype it had once shamelessly promoted.

Anyway, what with fashion stuck in a rut b/c of the economy, one must appreciate Kenny The Jet's little yellow tie-on-shades-of-gray tweaks to KG's basic creed -- the sleek sports coat over his vest and dress shirt, with the rumpled kerchief adding that little extra touch of WTF cares?

Given that the economy has put middle America in a more conservative mood, such that low-slung jeans have given way to prim, high-waist Mom dungarees and decolletage -- Alas! -- has become but a breathtaking decadence, one must celebrate what small sartorial advances we come by these days.

 

Sep 5, 2008

The Long & Shorts of Rafa Nadal


 
Word is Rafael Nadal postponed a long overdue update to his on-court apparel until he could get through the U.S. Open.

Um, and the reason the world No. 1 would want to continue picking his butt is?

Will giving up butt-picking turn out to be something like kicking the smoking habit? Where the quitter frets about finding something else to do with his hands?

May TCL suggest Rafa stop with the Eurosexual posing already, and take up the time-honored American athletic tradition of adjusting one's cup?

Whether or not he reaches the finals at Flushing Meadows and beats Roger Federer once there, the Spaniard would go a long way toward winning hearts in the U.S. if he would give up on those lame muscle shirts and clam diggers.
 

Jul 22, 2008

Terrell Owens: Above & Beyond


 
Our first thought upon seeing Terrell Owens at the ESPY's?

Excuse me, Monsieur Maitre'De. Here's 20 bucks. Can you direct us to Grauman's Chinese Theater? Maybe arrange a fast taxi? Then we're hoping to get from there to Koi in time to catch someone at least as famous as Avril Lavigne dining on overpriced sushi. Can you help us out?

But go figure. Mr. I've-Been-Totally-Screwed-By-The-Media had to go and help an ESPN reporter, of all people, after the doofus got himself hit by a decidedly un-Hollywood-glam Honda Civic during ESPN's red-carpet celeb weekend.

So, yeah, okay. T.O. looks like he rented his suit from the estate of the costume mistress for the extras from "Casablanca."

His good-guy-ness, especially while dressed like a hopeless dork, puts a entirely different spin on all the I'm-All-That casting he's endured from the MSSportsM over the last few years.

TCL has always known T.O. had it in him.

Though, admittedly, we wish he'd dressed better for the occasion.
 

Jun 24, 2008

In the Wheelhouse: Lourdes Ciccone Leon


 
"Really, Mum. A girl can only stand so much.

"It's bad enough everybody being, like, 'Oh, Lourdes, you look JUST LIKE Madge when she was young!'

"You've had me 'following in your footsteps' for just about forever -- what with taking ballet, tagging along to Kabbalah, pimping me in your so-last-century Madonna get-ups.

"(Admit it, Mum, it was me who turned you on to Ed Hardy. Because, uh, yeah, like you know the first thing about fashion. So chav.)

"But now you're dragging me to a dumb baseball game? Oh, and it's not about you? Not about selling 'Hard Candy'? Not 'Back in NYC -- without hubby Guy' photo ops?

'Oh, I see, yes, right, it's about introducing little David to the American Past...

'Um, Mummy? Who is that? ... Which team? I don't know which team! ... That guy there, in pinstripes. No. 13.

'You know him, really? Geez, whoever said you were a bee-atch? You're the awesomest Mum ever!

'What a brilliant idea to show little David all about baseball! Maybe Mr. Rodriguez could come over and show him how to play....'
 

Jun 10, 2008

Daily Diva: Carrie Underwood at Bat


 
How cute is Carrie Underwood, stepping up to the plate for the 18th Annual City of Hope Celebrity Softball Challenge?

We're not quite sure about the black batting gloves here, especially since she's on base. (Note to CU: Base runners stick their gloves, fingers up, in a back pocket. Cool players have gone one step further, eschewing gloves for a different sort of "flappage.")

That said, the country music superstar looks like (and apparently played like) she had some game.

That would be a 100 percent improvement over whatever baseball-like substance Naomi Campbell struck out with for "Ugly Betty."

Underwood, "American Idol's" Season 4 winner, also beats the heck out of Victoria Beckham's baseball star-turn. (Might be time to sweat the technique.)

Come to think of it, Carrie has a better voice, too. Sorry, Posh.
 

Jun 8, 2008

Daily Diva: Ana Ivanovic Wins Cute


 
Ana Ivanovic cruised past Dinara Safina in straight sets -- 6-4, 6-3 -- on Saturday at Roland Garros to win her first Grand Slam title.

And how ooo-la-la she was doing it!

The 20-year-old Serb has a sort of Katie-Holmes cuteness that's appealing. (Not everyone on the women's tour has to work the diva angle -- much as that gives TCL something to do.)

And, in IOHO, her duds for this year's French Open were the extra little spark that got her the win.

See, Ivanovic lost the 2007 FO (to Justine Henin). Why? Because no way the pink-on-cabernet number she wore was going to get her more than a lousy silver platter. Not paired with black socks and white court-shorties, anyway.

But the little number above has some sass! Especially because of the bubbly melon color.

Speaking of bubbles, we're not big fans of bubble hemlines (which make us think of maternity clothes. Or desperate-for-an-idea fashion designers). But this bubble skirt works -- the bubble is a tiny bubble, which added a little bit o' flirt to the skirt.

Not that Ana needed any help in that department.